Thursday, December 13, 2012

#89: Church Ball Makes Me Vomit.

I'm not be the world's greatest basketball player. Heck, I'm not even my family's greatest basketball player. But AT LEAST I used to be able to run up and down the court a few times and take some bad jumpers. Well, apparently not anymore.

Tonight I geared up for our big game with the 10th Ward. I slipped into my Lebron James shorts, put on my yoda T-shirt, and laced up my New Balance sneakers. I ate two hearty bowls of Rice Chex. I arrived at the church. I did some sweet leg warm-ups. I got put in the starting line-up (granted, we only had five players at the time). I ran up the court. I got the ball. I shot an airball. I ran back down the court. I got a three-pointer made over my head. I got passed the ball again. I fell down and travelled. I got back up. I started to feel sick. I frantically called for a time-out. I ran to the bathroom. I threw up Rice Chex into the toilet (the only shot I actually made tonight). I went home. I blogged about my pathetic athletic ability.

Two lessons to be learned:

1. Don't eat Rice Chex 5 minutes before playing basketball.
2. Do more than just ride a stationary bike while playing Words With Friends for exercise every night.

The end.
The world's ACTUAL greatest basketball player.


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