#139: Random General Conference Talk Generator (mormono.com/rct).

A few months ago I discovered a great website: mormono.com/rct that links you to a random General Conference talk from any past General Conference. You can also select a random talk from just the most recent Conference if you don't want to listen to older talks. However, for me, listening to older talks has been really awesome. Tonight I was linked to a talk from 1995 given by President Hinckley at the General Relief Society meeting titled "Stand Strong Against the Wiles of the World" shortly after he was called as President of the Church. I never would have looked for this talk on my own, but thanks to Mormono, I was able to discover it.

Mormono also has links to a random chapter of scripture from the full standard works, from the full standard works minus the Old Testament, or from just the Book of Mormon.

I don't know who created Mormono, but whoever you are, thanks!

#138: Becoming a Christlike Father.

In honor of Father's Day, I got the opportunity to speak in Sacrament meeting today. I thought I would share it with you. Happy Father's Day!

If I could choose one quality to inherit from my dad…besides his roguish good looks….it would have to be his sense of humor. My dad is one of the funniest men I know. In fact, my friends and I have developed a rating system for measuring the humor level of a joke in honor of my dad. We call it the “Dave Scale”. Laffy Taffy puns are a 1 on the Dave scale. A joke that makes you laugh out loud is a 3. And a joke that earns a 5? It’s gotta be the best joke of your life. I’m grateful that my dad could be here today and I want to wish him a happy Father’s Day and remind him it’s just like Mother’s Day, except I didn’t spend as much.

"The Family: A Proclamation to the World" reminds us that fathers are a fundamental part of the plan of happiness and that “by divine design, fathers are to preside over their families in love and righteousness.” However, it is clear that this perspective isn’t always shared by the rest of the world. David Blankenhorn, the author of Fatherless America, once said: “Today, American society is fundamentally divided and ambivalent about the fatherhood idea. Some people do not even remember it. Others are offended by it. Others, including more than a few family scholars, neglect it or disdain it.”

Whether it be the inspiring courage of Atticus Finch in "To Kill a Mockingbird" or the less inspiring parental tactics of Darth Vader, there are examples of both good and bad fathers readily available for us to learn from. In the scriptures, we read about Adam, our first physical father and also the father of our faith. We read about David who may have been a mighty king, but not necessarily a very good father. We read about Lehi who was willing to leave everything he had to protect his family. These fathers, among so many others, set an example for good or bad of fatherhood.

In addition to these real life fathers from the scriptures, Jesus once shared a parable about a father and two sons. Found in Luke chapter 15, we usually refer to this story as the parable of the prodigal son. However, I would like to take a different perspective today and call it the parable of the Christlike father (original idea from a sermon by Pastor Jim Henry, “The Parable of the Perfect Father”).

The first thing we see is that the Christlike father is approachable. In verse 11 and 12, we read: A certain man had two sons: And the younger of them said to his father, Father, give me the portion of goods that falleth to me.” Essentially, the younger son came to his father and said, “I want what is mine and I want it now.''

This son surely knew that he could ask his father for such an important thing because his father was approachable. As a father, one of the greatest gifts you can give your children is to listen to them. When you listen to what they say, you're letting them know that “you are important to me.” Isn’t this how our Heavenly Father is? He is available to us day or night in any circumstance if we are simply willing to reach out to Him in prayer.

Continuing in verse 12 of the parable, we see that the Christlike father complied with his son’s request by “dividing unto him his living”, which leads to the second lesson from the parable. You may ask, ''Didn’t the father know his son was going to waste his inheritance?'' As Pastor Henry put it, “When your child approaches you and asks you to do something that you know is against everything they'd been raised to believe and do; you know they're going to go out there and get into trouble”, shouldn’t you stop them?

I personally think that before giving his son his inheritance, this Christlike father did all that he could to persuade his son not to go and squander it. He wanted his son to stay, to be happy and to succeed. But this father came to a point where he knew his son’s mind had been set. His son had a legal right to his inheritance and ultimately he would not stop his son.

Similarly, I believe our Heavenly Father tries to warn us. He has given us the scriptures, our leaders, our families and friends, and the companionship of the Holy Ghost. But He is also a God who allows us to make our own choices, no matter how wrong they may be. And when we come and say, ''I want this—I want what’s mine'' God allows it because he loves us and values our agency so much.

I’m not trying to say that as fathers we should give into every request we receive from our children, because that’s certainly not the case. But what I am trying to say is that like our Heavenly Father, once we have done all that we can to teach and raise our children in righteousness, once the time is right, we must allow them to make their own choices, just as our Heavenly Father does for us.

In the parable, the younger son took his inheritance and went off to a distant country and quickly squandered it all in riotous living (possibly at the Caesar’s Palace of his time). After he had wasted his living, he had nothing left. He had lost everything, there was a famine in the country, and he was forced to become a servant. Not only that, but he became a servant with a terrible job—he was responsible for feeding the pigs. As described by Pastor Henry, here was “a Jewish boy who was forbidden to even taste of it and here he was serving the pigs, eating what they ate.”

As we know, eventually this son came to his senses and decided to come home, realizing to himself that “the hired servants of my father have bread enough to spare, and I perish with hunger! I will arise and go to my father, and will say unto him, Father, I have sinned against heaven, and before thee, and am no more worthy to be called thy son: make me as one of thy hired servants…and he arose, and came to his father. But when he was yet a great way off, his father saw him, and had compassion, and ran, and fell on his neck, and kissed him.”

The Prodigal Son, by Clark Kelley Price

Notice that in addition to being an approachable and consenting father, he was also an awaiting father. The father wasn't back at home watching the NBA finals. As described by Pastor Henry, “I don't know how long that boy had been gone, but the father was still looking down that road to see when the penitent prodigal was going to come home. Suddenly he saw that figure coming. The clothes were not the same ones he went off with, his face had the lines of sin upon it, but he knew that walk anywhere. That was his boy! What did the father do-? Did he say: ‘I'm just going to sit here on the porch and when he comes home, I'm going to say, ''All right -- you see there. You got what you deserved.’” No. This father didn't do that. He ran down the road running to meet his son.

Notice now that this Christlike father is a forgiving father. His son began to say “Father, I have sinned against heaven, and in thy sight, and am no more worthy to be called thy son.” But the father instead said to his servants, Bring forth the best robe, and put it on him; and put a ring on his hand, and shoes on his feet: And bring hither the fatted calf, and kill it; and let us eat, and be merry: For this my son was dead, and is alive again; he was lost, and is found.” A Christlike father is able to forgive the mistakes of the past.

One final lesson I learned from this parable relates to the interaction this father had with his older, more faithful son after his younger brother returned home. Verse 25 reads: Now his elder son was in the field: and as he came and drew nigh to the house, he heard music and dancing. And he called one of the servants, and asked what these things meant. And the servant said, Thy brother is come; and thy father hath killed the fatted calf, because he hath received him safe and sound. And the elder son was angry, and would not go in: therefore came his father out, and entreated him. And his father said unto him, Son, thou art ever with me, and all that I have is thine.

About this interaction, Elder Holland has said: “The father in this story does not compare his sons with each other. His gestures of compassion toward one do not require a withdrawal or denial of love for the other. He is divinely generous to both of these sons. Toward both of his children he extends charity.”

By making a conscious effort to become a more Christlike father, our priorities will change, our tempers will mellow, and our love will grow. He is our greatest example, yet He never took credit, saying instead, “Verily, verily, I say unto you, The Son can do nothing of himself, but what he seeth the Father do: for whatsoever things he doeth, these also doeth the Son likewise.”

Regarding fatherhood, I think it is also important to acknowledge that not all families are blessed to have a father in the home. Elder Christoffersonsaid, “Whether due to death, abandonment, or divorce some children don’t have fathers living with them. Some may have fathers who are physically present but emotionally absent or in other ways inattentive or nonsupportive.”

He commented on the other hand, that “some men are single fathers, foster fathers, or stepfathers. Many of them strive mightily and do their very best in an often difficult role. We honor those who do all that can be done in love, patience, and self-sacrifice to meet individual and family needs. It should be noted that God Himself entrusted His Only Begotten Son to a foster father. Surely some of the credit goes to Joseph for the fact that as Jesus grew, He ‘increased in wisdom and stature, and in favour with God and man.’”

For me personally, becoming a father has been the greatest blessing in the world. After seven years of trying to have children, Diane and I were blessed with our daughter. I am so thankful for Diane. She never gave up on having a family and she is a wonderful mother. Our little girl is the light of my life and I eagerly look forward to “Dadderday” each weekend when we get to spend the day together. I never thought I could love someone as much as I love her. I hope it gives me a slight glimpse into the way our Heavenly Father feels about each of us.

#137: New 3rd Hour Meeting Manual.

I take no credit for this, but man, I love it.

http://imgur.com/behJmqD

#136: VidAngel.com - Edited Movies Done Right!

I like movies (duh, name of blog). They make me laugh, they make me cry, and they usually make Diane fall asleep.

As a kid, my parents wanted me and my siblings to watch movies which they felt were appropriate and would not be offensive due to bad language, sexual content, or extreme violence. In fact, my mom even wrote an Ensign article about good media choices back in 2001 (way to go, mom!). As a result, I still try to watch movies that are generally wholesome and family friendly.

However, sometimes I am tempted to watch something that I know I shouldn't (particularly, something that is rated-R or PG-13 that obviously should be rated R). In the past, I would usually just miss out on these movies or read about their plots on Wikipedia so I would at least have some idea what they were about (here's looking at you Elysium).

Good Will Hunting in Space

Well, last year I stumbled across vidangel.com, a fantastic website that allows me to watch edited digital movies through YouTube or Google Play. VidAngel is particularly awesome because it is 100% legal (unlike buying a copy of an edited movie) and has a partnership with Google. The video below can describe it much better than I can, but let me just say that I have been particularly pleased with the service. My favorite part is that you can customize the filter--you get to choose which swear words, types of sexual content or violence that you are comfortable with.

VidAngel is currently in private beta mode, but if you use the link above, you can give it a try (plus, I get a free movie if you watch one). Through VidAngel, you can watch newly released movies for $2 in HD (after the buy-back credit--again, see video below).

 You can also follow what the company is currently up to on their blog.

Check it out!

#135: "Testimony Through Trials".

A few weeks ago, one of our good friends shared the following talk about maintaining a testimony through trials, With her permission, I would like to share the talk with you.

I am so glad to be on the earth today. The gospel is rolling forth to fill the earth and we look forward to the second coming of Jesus Christ. But with all the wonderful things that are happening, we also know that life brings trials for everyone. It is a necessary part of our progression and the Plan of Happiness. These trials come in many different forms and they try our testimony of Jesus Christ. The bishop asked me to share with you today how we can strive to maintain a testimony through difficult times.

I’ve spent my whole life building a testimony. It is a process that I continue today. I’ve had many wonderful teachers, friends, and family members who have influenced me for good. My testimony comes through diligence in doing all the things I was taught in Primary: prayer, scripture study, church and temple attendance. Those things never change.

President Uchtdorf said of testimonies, “"Let us acknowledge that most often gaining a testimony is not a task of a minute, an hour, or a day. It is not once and done. The process of gathering spiritual light is the quest of a lifetime...Some may say that the steps are too hard or that they are not worth the effort. But I suggest that this personal testimony of the gospel and the Church is the most important thing you can earn in this life. It will not only bless and guide you during this life, but it will also have a direct bearing on your life throughout eternity” (“Receiving a Testimony of Light and Truth,” Oct 2014 General Conference).

President Dieter F. Uchtdorf

This past week I pondered some different personal trials and how my testimony helped me through them. I selected three that I would like to talk on: parenting, standing for truth, and losing a loved one.

First, I will start with parenting, which is the hardest thing I’ve ever done. When I first became a mother, my husband and I were living in Ann Arbor, Michigan. We were far from family and had limited communication with them, not like we have today. I remember feeling stressed and worried about taking care of my first child. First of all, would she survive? Was she eating enough? Was she supposed to cry that much? How do we get her to sleep? Over time my worries shifted from the children’s physical needs, to their spiritual and emotional needs and character development. Would I be a good mother?

Elder Neil L. Andersen taught how we can face difficult situations, “How do you remain “steadfast and immovable” during a trial of faith? You immerse yourself in the very things that helped build your core of faith: you exercise faith in Christ, you pray, you ponder the scriptures, you repent, you keep the commandments, and you serve others” (“Trial of Your Faith,” Oct 2012 General Conference).

Elder Neil L. Andersen

I continued to study my scriptures and pray daily, just like I had done for so many years, and that brought me strength. It is amazing how reading the same passage of scripture, even the most unlikely passage, can bring very different answers to you at certain times in your life. During that first month of my daughter’s life, I was in the book of Alma reading about Ammon’s mission to the Lamanites. This scripture spoke peace to me one morning over eleven years ago and still speaks to me today in the midst of raising six kids and the many challenges that come with it.

“But behold, my beloved brethren, we came into the wilderness not with the intent to destroy our brethren, but with the intent that perhaps we might save some few of their souls. Now when our hearts were depressed, and we were about to turn back, behold, the Lord comforted us, and said: Go amongst thy brethren, the Lamanites, and bear with patience thine afflictions, and I will give unto you success. And now behold, we have come, and been forth amongst them; and we have been patient in our sufferings, and we have suffered every privation; yea, we have traveled from house to house, relying upon the mercies of the world—not upon the mercies of the world alone but upon the mercies of God” (Alma 26:26-28).

The prophet/missionary Ammon defending King Lamoni's flocks

As Nephi taught, I likened this scripture to myself: Saving souls is like bringing children into a temple marriage. Yes, there will be days when you will be depressed, feel in effective, overwhelmed by your weaknesses, and want to give up; but don’t turn back. Continue to be patient during your trials. If the Lord can use Ammon and his brethren to convert thousands of ferocious, hard-hearted Lamanites to the gospel, then He certainly has the power to help you raise righteous children. Rely on Jesus Christ, his mercy and his grace. And so I do, everyday as a parent.

Other trials may come when we are asked by church leaders to stand up for truth in the face of sometimes hostile opposition. During 2008 when we were living in Sacramento, the church asked the members in California to actively campaign for the passage of Proposition 8 to affirm traditional marriage. Not only were we asked to make significant financial contributions to this campaign, but also to contribute our time making phone calls, knocking doors, and displaying signs in yards and on street corners to bolster support for this measure.

Because of this, I knew that we would be subject to harsh criticism and considered by some to be bigots. People would judge us as unkind, unfair, and just plain mean. I took heat on social media from old high school friends and others. Other church members experienced vandalism and even lost their jobs over this campaign. I remember walking a neighborhood to distribute door hangers and passing our local ward building to find hundreds of Prop 8 signs stolen from people’s yard strewn all over the the church property. The intolerance towards our position was very upsetting. But Elder Andersen also taught: “Like the intense fire that transforms iron into steel, as we remain faithful during the fiery trial of our faith, we are spiritually refined and strengthened.”

Even though at times I wanted to shrink (and just quietly vote at the ballot box), I knew that our direction in this campaign was coming from the prophet. I knew the prophet was the mouthpiece for Jesus Christ on the earth. I knew that upholding traditional marriage was important in the church and in our society. There were bright moments along the way, where we united with neighbors of other faiths in our stance on marriage. I also had meaningful conversations with some voters on the phone about the importance of traditional marriage in society. I was sharing my testimony of marriage in that campaign.

In the end Prop 8 did pass, though later overturned, and I knew it was thanks to faithful Mormons all over the state who heeded the prophet’s call to defend traditional marriage. Being a part of the Prop 8 campaign turned into a spiritual experience for me, though a fiery one. I don’t think that is the end of battles we as church members must fight as the distance between the world’s view and the church’s view continues to widen.

It is helpful in these difficult situations to remember this teaching from Elder Andersen: “Our faith is centered in God, our Father, and in His Son, Jesus Christ, our Savior and Redeemer. It is bolstered by our knowledge that the fullness of the gospel has been restored to the earth, that the Book of Mormon is the word of God, and that prophets and apostles today hold the keys of the priesthood. We treasure our faith, work to strengthen our faith, pray for increased faith, and do all within our power to protect and defend our faith.”

Finally, many go through the trial of losing a loved one, like we have recently in our own ward. This is one trial that I have not had to bear firsthand, but I marvel at those around me who have. As my husband shared in his talk a few months ago, we had the difficult experience of losing our Bishop’s young wife suddenly and unexpectedly over two years ago. This hit me so hard, because we were friends who lived on the same street, we were the exact same age, and had the same number of children, many of whose ages overlapped. For weeks, I mourned heavily over this loss because I knew the many things that I did for our family in our home. I didn’t understand why it had to happen. Why wasn’t she healed? Why was she appointed to die? I wondered how that family would survive this trial. How would they remain strong? How would they function from day to day? How could we as neighbors and friends help them?

I was touched when our stake president challenged us in this difficult time that instead of asking "why" and pondering the unfairness of the situation, that we should look for ways to be grateful for the time we spent with Kim and how she impacted our lives. This was great counsel. With prayer and gratitude for Kim’s life, we all pressed forward, just like we will do again in this ward. I prayed for that family with all my might and strength. I fulfilled every service opportunity given to me on their behalf.

The spirit told me that God had a plan for that family, even if I couldn’t see it. I knew God loved them immensely and I knew God loved Kim, even if he had to take her physically from the earth away from her children. After this painful loss, our ward and the extended family pulled together to supported them in every possible way. We watched as our bishop and his children never faltered in their church activity. He showed up the very next Sunday with all of his children to conduct sacrament meeting. It was the Primary Program and all of his children in Primary sang so valiantly. The spirit was so strong that day, and we were all lifted by the faith and testimony of that family.

Elder Andersen gives us life-saving counsel in our trials: “When faced with a trial of faith—whatever you do, you don’t step away from the Church! Distancing yourself from the kingdom of God during a trial of faith is like leaving the safety of a secure storm cellar just as the tornado comes into view….It is within the sanctuary of the Church that we protect our faith. Meeting together with others who believe, we pray and find answers to our prayers; we worship through music, share testimony of the Savior, serve one another, and feel the Spirit of the Lord. We partake of the sacrament, receive the blessings of the priesthood, and attend the temple. The Lord declared, ‘In the ordinances … , the power of godliness is manifest.’ When you are faced with a test of faith, stay within the safety and security of the household of God. There is always a place for you here. No trial is so large we can’t overcome it together”.

What a beautiful promise from an apostle of the Lord. I like how he uses the pronoun “we.” WE are in this together. At baptism we make that important covenant “to bear one another’s burdens, that they may be light... to mourn with those that mourn; and comfort those that stand in need of comfort” (Mosiah 18:8-9).

I know of many other stories like this throughout the church. Another example was shared in a past General Women’s Meeting where they showed a video of sisters from around the world sharing their testimony of the temple. One sister from Haiti shared the experience of losing all six of her children in a devastating earthquake. My heart just ached at the emptiness she must feel in their absence. But she continues to endure to the end, and she finds peace in attending the temple and praying to God. In General Conference Sister Jean A. Stevens taught, “The gospel of Jesus Christ is not a checklist of things to do; rather, it lives in our hearts. The gospel is not weight; it is wings. It carries us” (“Fear Not; I Am with Thee,” Apr 2014 General Conference).

Sister Jean A. Stevens

A strong testimony can carry all of us through our darkest days.

In closing, I know that most of us aren’t faced with monumental trials every day of our lives, but we must still make that daily effort to strengthen our testimonies. If we feel that we don’t have a testimony, or it is not as strong as we would like it to be, we can start today. The Lord will bless us in our sincere effort to gain a strong testimony. President Uchtdorf said encouragingly of receiving light and truth:

“The perfect place to begin is exactly where you are right now. It doesn’t matter how unqualified you may think you are or how far behind others you may feel. The very moment you begin to seek your Heavenly Father, in that moment, the hope of His light will begin to awaken, enliven, and ennoble your soul. The darkness may not dissipate all at once, but as surely as night always gives way to dawn, the light will come" (The Hope of God’s Light”, Apr 2013 General Conference).

I am thankful for a strong testimony of Jesus Christ and his gospel. I know my testimony is something that I will continue to build and strengthen my entire life. My testimony points me to Jesus Christ. I know it is through Jesus Christ and his grace that I can overcome the trials I face in this life. He is my rock and sure foundation (Helaman 5:12) that will anchor me in the storms of life. In the name of Jesus Christ. Amen.

#133: How to Get a Free Ancestry.com Account (for LDS Church Members).

In February of this year, I remember hearing an exciting announcement that the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints had entered into partnerships with ancestry.com, findmypast.com, and myheritage.com to provide free premium memberships for all members of the church. This is a pretty big deal since premium memberships to those sites range in the $200 - $400 range per year. I previously had a paid membership to ancestry.com, which in my opinion, is the greatest website in the world for genealogists/family historians. It literally has billions (with a b) of historical records scanned and indexed for easy searching.

When I heard the announcement, I was very eager to cancel my current paid Ancestry membership and get started with a free membership instead (as well as new memberships to Findmypast and Myheritage). However, since February I haven't heard any updates about it.

Well, today I decided to do some searching and found that it is really easy to get your free accounts. Simply go to familysearch.org/partneraccess and you can create a free account to each of the three websites! It takes a mere matter of minutes. Happy searching!

familysearch.org/partneraccess

#132: Stuff to Do While Pregnant.

Okay, so the title of this post is a little misleading. Technically, I'm not pregnant, but my best friend is. So, I guess instead it should have read, "Stuff to Do While Pregnant or While Being Married to Someone Who Is Pregnant", but that is really quite wordy, so I opted for the shorter and slightly misleading title instead.

Anyway, without further ado, here are pictures of some stuff to do while pregnant or while being married to someone who is pregnant.

Pose for baby shower invitations
(make sure to remove the background hose with Photoshop).

Take a nap with your favorite dog.

Take a nap with your favorite new niece.

Have a family reunion and visit cool Mormon places.

Have a family reunion and visit cool non-Mormon places.

Have a family reunion and play Minute to Win-It games.
I was SO CLOSE to stacking that third dice (di?)!

Have a family reunion and shake what yo' mama gave ya.

Have a family reunion and play cornhole for hours in the yard.

Bake homemade bread.

Decorate your new nursery.

Hang out with Shauna Lake...and that other guy she works with. 

Hang out with a bird on a pier.

Follow your cravings.

Register for baby stuff at Target and pretend you work for the FBI.

Register for baby stuff at Target and pretend you are Queen Amidala.

Get awesome Star Wars stuff at your baby shower.

Pose in front of flowers.

Pose in front of a temple.

Pose in front of another temple.

Pose in front of Carlo's Bake Shop.

Last but not least, pose in front of the beach.

#131: On the Lord's Errand: The Life of Thomas S. Monson.

This afternoon while Diane took a Sunday nap, I decided to start poking out the plastic holes from the new 320-slot movie case I bought from Amazon. I love to be organized, and I relished the thought of having every movie we own in proper genre order all in one big case (between the DVD and Blu-Ray versions of Star Wars alone, it totals 18 discs! Don't even get me started on the Lord of the Rings).

The biggest movie case I could find.

After poking out the first 6 plastic holes, I realized that this was going to be painfully boring. So, to make the poking more bearable, I decided to see what video features were on lds.org to help me pass the time. I stumbled across an hour-long video titled "On the Lord's Errand: The Life of Thomas S. Monson". The video was produced in conjunction with President Monson being called as the sixteenth president of the Church in 2008. See below for the YouTube version direct link, as well.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=th6OrORV8os

Well, after watching it, I knew I needed to blog about it. What a treat! As I watched, I felt the Holy Ghost multiple times as I learned about President Monson's remarkable life. So, whether you have plastic movie case holes that you need to poke out or if you just want to watch a truly uplifting movie, check it out. I think you'll like it just as much as I did.

#130: The Challenge of Infertility: An Update.

Two years ago I wrote a guest post titled "The Challenge of Infertility" on the blog of my good friend, Jocelyn Christensen. It was an opportunity for me and Diane to explain the pain and sadness that can come with infertility, but it was ALSO an opportunity for us to express the great hope and joy that can come through the gospel of Jesus Christ.

Just prior to writing the guest post, Diane and I had experienced a failed and costly attempt at in vitro fertilization. We were unsure of what next steps to take but decided the next month to try a round of artificial insemination (a much cheaper but not as effective treatment as in vitro) with a new doctor. Unfortunately, it too was unsuccessful.

At that point, we decided that adoption was the right choice for us to pursue. We quickly completed our application through LDS Family Services, passed inspection with the state (including installing child-safety locks, which continue to defeat me on a daily basis), created an adoption blog (no longer being updated due to my own laziness), and became members of the local Families Supporting Adoption board.

Me and the foxy wife posing for our adoption blog.

We LOVED all of the wonderful people we met while pursuing adoption. They have now become some of our closest friends, and we always rejoice when we hear of another couple having success through the adoption process. Adoption is a miracle and is part of God's plan for helping children come to the right loving homes. Another couple in our ward adopted a beautiful baby girl during this time, and we love her like crazy. In fact, I've been trying to teach her to roar like a wookiee, but at eight months old with no Adam's apple, she's still a work-in-progress.

As for us, unfortunately, after a few months of waiting and hoping, we hadn't experienced a successful adoption of our own. We began to worry that we would never have kids of our own, although we tried to stay optimistic. At one point, Diane wrote, "This week my world was busy and wonderful. I love life and I feel so blessed! On Tuesday night I went to a baby shower. I have to 'gear up' for baby showers as it is sometimes hard to be the only woman in the room who doesn’t have any pregnancy stories and to some degree feels like the 'odd ball'. I just try to nod when they talk about baby snuggling, puke, poop, developmental mile stone’s, etc...but it's hard. However, I decided this week that I was not going to be sad or feel down. Do I still feel a little odd? Well... yes. But instead of feeling sad, I just tried to think of all of my blessings and think about the day that we will hopefully get to adopt and bring home our sweet baby."

Finally, after a year of no adoption news, my heart began to break for my sweet wife. She tried so hard to never complain, but I knew that her greatest desire was to become a mother. And it just wasn't happening. If you know Diane, then you know how loving, kind, and cheerful she is; and you know that she would be a fantastic mother. But alas, it just didn't seem possible.

With  the encouragement of our family, in November 2013, we decided that we would try in vitro one more time. We didn't try to keep it a secret from our families this time because we knew that we needed all of the prayers and fasting that we could possibly get. In vitro is a big financial commitment (and one of the reasons why I still drive my smokin' hot 1995 Buick Century), but we felt that we had one more shot left in us. If it didn't work out, we would continue to hope for adoption while being the best uncle and aunt that we could be.

Just passed inspection yesterday. Ready to rock for another year.

Well, guess what? IN VITRO WORKED!!! On Christmas Eve 2013, Diane and I had our first ever positive pregnancy test in six years of trying. Who knew that pee on a stick could bring so much joy? It was the most amazing feeling in the world.

Our first ever plus sign.

We are now 22 weeks along with our first beautiful, sweet baby girl. I was never too big on other people's ultrasound pictures, but man, I've never seen anything cuter than my future daughter's grainy ultrasound profile pic.

I wanted to personally say thank you to everyone who has prayed for us, fasted for us, cried for us, and hoped for us. I cannot wait for the adventure of being a dad and having a little buddy. Life is so good.

#129: Apostle Doodles.

I love General Conference. It is one of the best weekends of the year. Sometimes though I have a hard time paying attention through all ten hours, and I will start to drift off. But not this year.

To help me pay better attention this weekend, I drew some of the brethren on my iPad as they were speaking. I still don't know how to effectively shade a drawing, and for the life of me I can't draw a normal looking woman (out of respect, I won't post my attempt at drawing Jean R. Stevens), but overall, I am pleased with the results (although I won't be quitting my day job). Drawing awesome old guys may just become my new hobby.

Elder Robert D. Hales

Elder Dallin H. Oaks

Elder Quentin L. Cook

Elder Jeffrey R. Holland

President Dieter F. Uchtdorf

President Henry B. Eyring

President Thomas S. Monson

#128: "Becoming A Disciple of Christ" by Hillary Bowler.

Today in sacrament meeting, we had two fantastic speakers--Greg Bilbao, our visiting high councilor, and Hillary Bowler, a recently returned sister missionary. Hillary, in particular, gave one of the best talks I have ever heard. She radiated both her testimony of the gospel and her love for the Lord. As I listened to her, I felt a desire to be a better disciple of Christ. With her permission, I have posted her talk in its entirety below. Thanks Hillary!

Hillary also writes freelance articles for the Deseret News.
You can read her recent articles here.
Copyright Shelbi Jia Photography

Brother Bilbao asked me to speak on becoming a disciple of Christ. He offered a link to a talk and asked me to reference Alma Chapter 5. My first thought with Alma Chapter 5 is usually along the lines of “Oh, no….” You see, I’ve come to discover that most scriptures fall in one of two categories: Pat-on-the-back scriptures—you know, the encouraging kind that are great pick-me-ups—and kick-in-the-pants scriptures. I have often categorized the whole chapter of Alma 5 as a “kick-in-the-pants” and it became a go-to of sorts for any time I feel like, “Hey, I’m doing pretty good.’ It is a healthy dose of humility to just about anyone. Works every time!

But of course, as I prayed and studied a few different talks and scriptures, I found myself coming back again and again to Alma 5 and will reference much of it today.

The first question of this topic is what is a disciple? When you look the word up in the dictionary it usually has a generic definition like “One who embraces and assists in spreading the teachings of another,” or “an active adherent, as of a movement or philosophy.”

However, even most of the worlds definitions allude to Jesus Christ. In fact, if you google “disciple,” “disciple of Christ” is one of the first things that comes up. Even the world knows what a disciple is. A disciple is a follower of Christ.

I like to look at Alma 5 as a sort disciple checklist. Literally. I go to it thinking, ‘Alright, how good of a disciple are you being lately?”

(Vs 6:) Have you retained in remembrance the captivity of your fathers?
(Vs. 14:) Have ye spiritually been born of God?
(Vs. 15:) Do ye exercise faith?
(Vs. 16:) Can you imagine unto yourself, that ye hear the voice of the Lord saying unto in that day: Come unto me, ye blessed?

This is where I start sweating:

(Vs. 17:) Or do ye imagine unto yourself that ye can lie unto the Lord?
(Vs. 18:) Can ye imagine yourself brought before the tribunal of God with your soul filled with guilt and remorse?
(Vs. 19: )Can ye look up to God at that day with a pure heart and clean hands?
(Vs. 20:) Can ye think of being saved when you have yielded yourself to become subject to the devil?

A few more hypothetical questions, and skip to the current self evaluation.
(Vs. 27:) Do ye keep yourself blameless before God? Have ye been sufficiently humble?
(Vs. 28:) Are ye stripped of pride?
(Vs. 29:) Are ye stripped of envy?
(Vs. 30;) Do ye mock your brother?

So do you see how this works as a nice dose of humility? I want to dispel one myth about becoming a disciple. I’m not sure I can speak for all of you, but when I hear the word “disciple” I often think of the actual 12 disciples, or rather, apostles. I think of being a true disciple of Christ as something I couldn’t possibly achieve because I am not at their level.

I love this reference in D&C 8:2: “Yea, behold, I will tell you in your mind and in your heart, by the Holy Ghost, which shall come upon you and which shall dwell in your heart.”

A lot of us are familiar with that verse, but we forget to go on to the next one: “Now, behold, this is the spirit of revelation; behold, this is the spirit by which Moses brought the children of Israel through the Red Sea on dry ground.”

Wait a minute—the same spirit? We’re talking prophets and parting seas. I can get that same spirit? Yes!

One of my favorite parts of Alma 5 is found in verses 45 and 46, near the end of Alma’s sermon. It reads: "And this is not all. Do ye not suppose that I know of these things myself? Behold, I testify unto you that I do know that these things whereof I have spoken are true. And how do ye suppose that I know of their surety? Behold, I say unto you they are made known unto me by the Holy Spirit of God. Behold, I have fasted and prayed many days that I might know these things of myself. And now I do know of myself that they are true; for the Lord God hath made them manifest unto me by his Holy Spirit; and this is the spirit of revelation which is in me.”

Brothers and sisters, this is Alma the Younger speaking. This is the very same visited-by-an-angel-and-in-a-coma-for-days Alma. Talk about a "wow" conversion experience. But what strikes me most here is that Alma doesn’t say anything about angels. Alma still had to get and retain his testimony and his admirable discipleship. He did it with fasting and prayer--some things we are taught to do regularly. I think that’s something that I can pull off OK. In the book "True to the Faith," it says, ‘You can receive a sure testimony of Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ only by the power of the Holy Ghost. His communication to your spirit carries far more certainty than any communication you can receive through your natural senses.”

I can testify to this fact. I have seen and experienced some pretty memorable things by the worlds standards, but nothing blazes in my memory quite like my sacred experiences with the Holy Spirit. The same Spirit that has guided prophets. God is no respecter of disciples.

In the October 2012 General Conference talk “Becoming a True Disciple,” Elder Daniel L. Johnson of the Seventy shared a temple president’s story that I will repeat here:

“It had been a beautiful spring for the fruit-growing communities in northern Mexico. The fruit trees were in full bloom, and expectations were high for a bounteous harvest. Plans were already being made to pay off loans, replace needed equipment and aging orchards, and meet personal commitments such as school tuition for family members. Plans were even being made for family vacations. There was a general air of optimism. Then, on a Monday afternoon in late March, a winter storm moved in, and it began to snow. It snowed until about three o’clock in the morning. Then, as the clouds moved out, the temperature plummeted. Throughout the night and early morning, every effort was made to save at least a part of the fruit crop. It was all to no avail. It simply got too cold, and the crop was totally frozen. There would be no fruit to be harvested and sold this year. Tuesday dawned with the sickening and disheartening loss of all those wonderful plans, expectations, and dreams of just the day before.

I received an email regarding that terrible Tuesday morning from Sandra Hatch, the wife of John Hatch, then-first counselor in the presidency of the Colonia Juárez Chihuahua Temple. I quote portions of that email: “John got up early—about 6:30—to run up to the temple to see if we should cancel the session this morning. He came back saying that the parking lot and road were clear, so we decided to go ahead. We figured that maybe some of the workers who didn’t have orchards would come, and we could put all the workers into the session. … It was so inspiring to see the men come in, one after another. There they were, after no sleep at all, and figuring their crops were lost. … I was watching them during our preparation meeting, and they were having a hard time staying awake. But instead of figuring they had a good excuse to not come, they were there. And there were 38 people in the session (a full session)! It was an uplifting morning for us, and we thanked Heavenly Father for good people who do their duty, no matter what happens. I felt a special spirit there this morning. I am sure He was pleased to know that we love His house and felt that it was a good place to be on such a difficult morning.”

Elder Johnson goes on to sum it up very simply: To become a better disciple of Jesus Christ, we need to keep the commandments and serve others. These good people understood that being a disciple sometimes means sacrifice, but it mostly means that you’re just trying to do good and be good.

As I was preparing this talk, I had had another General Conference talk come to mind, and it surprised me. I’m honestly not sure if I’d even read it before. It’s called “A Child and a Disciple” by President Henry B. Eyring from the April 2003 General Conference. In the talk, President Eyring focuses on an extremely important part of discipleship that I mentioned briefly in its definition before. A disciple is one who embraces and assists in spreading the Gospel of Jesus Christ.

On my mission, I learned that most of the “teaching” I did didn’t take place in a normal teaching setting. It wasn’t always informational. I taught people more by becoming a better disciple myself than I did by telling them how to be one.

President Eyring pointed out that sharing the gospel comes naturally for some people. Those people, he explained, know that they are children of God and disciples of Jesus Christ. He said,“Your worthiness and your desire will shine in your face and your eyes. You will be excited about the Lord’s Church and His work, and it will show. You will be His disciple 24 hours a day in every situation. You won’t need to build up your courage for one great moment to speak to someone and then retreat. The fact that most people are not interested in the restored gospel will have little bearing on what you do and say. Speaking what you believe will be part of what you are.”

Then he touches on a very important point:

“To be part of that miracle, you must not wait until you feel closer to Heavenly Father or until you are sure that you have been purified through the Atonement of Jesus Christ. … you will find yourself feeling and saying things beyond your past experience. And then in time you will feel yourself drawing closer to your Heavenly Father, and you will feel the cleansing and the forgiveness the Savior promises His faithful witnesses. And you will feel His approval, knowing you have done what He asked of you, because He loves you and trusts you.”

I couldn’t wait until I had a perfect testimony to share it. That was never an option in the mission field, and I’m grateful every day that I was put in that tight spot. It meant I could grow. And I did.

If you haven’t noticed, I’ve spent a lot of time talking and a whole lot of it not sharing stories from my mission. In all honesty, I could’ve come up with a million different experiences to illustrate the topic of this talk, but I decided to take a different direction.

I highly recommend missions to just about anyone. I don’t, however, recommend coming home. It has been a struggle for me to transition from becoming a direct representative of Jesus Christ to coming home and trying to figure out how to apply it all and just be a better disciple.

In my study, I did revisit one old friend from my mission. I was blessed to be in the field during the many changes that followed the official age change. I was called as one of the first sister training leaders in my mission. This gave me the beautiful opportunity to work with and counsel many of my fellow sisters. Time and time again, I found myself pointing them to a tiny section in Preach My Gospel titled “A Successful Missionary.”

How can we know we’re being successful? How can we know we are good enough as disciples?

It’s answered pretty well in this one sentence on Page 11 of Preach My Gospel: “You can feel certain that the Lord is pleased when you feel the Spirit working through you.”

I slowly began to focus less on the disciple checklist and more on feeling and listening to the Spirit. When I do that, I not only feel inspired to be better. I realize I’m actually doing OK.

As I read through Alma 5 and begin to feel like a proud, vain and rotten human being, I quickly realize that I will always come up short. But I know that through the Atonement of Jesus Christ it will all be made good. He asks us to follow Him, then He helps us follow Him. I know He loves us, and I love Him.

President Eyring also once said,“If you have felt the influence of the Holy Ghost today, you may take it as evidence that the Atonement is working in your life.”

As Alma said near the end of chapter 5, “Come ye out from the wicked and be ye separate.” Good for you for separating yourselves today and for being here. May we each continue to seek, feel and listen to the Spirit—using all of the basic tools we have always been taught to use—and become true disciples of Jesus Christ.